The Mystery

The threads of connection. How closely connected are you to everybody around you? You might think you understand somebody, but actually, you don't. Can you know somebody well without understanding them? Possibly not. And what happens when you think you know someone and understand them well, when something comes along that irreversibly shatters this belief? How long must you know somebody for, to really know them? Even then, do you really know them?

Everyone you meet is complicated. And usually, you see only one or maybe two out of their three dimensions. There's always going to be something you just don't know. But, by some chance, if you do know every aspect of a person, the element of mystery is lost, and your interest dies. When you know something so well, what else is left to explore?

So how is it that you stick to your best friend even though you know everything about him/her? At least, you think you do. What I want to figure out, is how someone's interest keeps ticking in someone else, no matter how long. And why is it that some people lose interest in you much faster? Can you judge how interesting you are by the number of people you know and have stuck? Whether in an intimate relationship or a good friendship, what keeps you ticking? Can you put your finger on it? Is it that the other person has something new every time you meet them? Is it because they make you laugh? Is it because they are multi-talented, or intelligent, or good looking? Is it the activities that they do? How true is it in such cases that opposites attract or birds of a feather flock together?

I've grown up to realise that after a certain point in everyone's life, age stops to matter... the lines of division dissolve with the knowledge of the birds and the bees, and a better understanding of people and the world. You might get along well with a person who is five years younger than you and a person six years older than you. So is it interests then? Or opposing ideas or different points of view? Or experiences? Or a combination of them all? With the number of people who have come and gone from my life... and those who've stayed... it will always be a mystery to me as to WHY. Did they admire me for something I could do? Or want to help me out with something I couldn't do? Did they like what I said, how I said, how I dressed, how I looked, what I knew, how smart I was, how funny I was, how many things I could do, how well I could do those things, how many things I knew about, how broad minded I was? Is it the situations that people are in at that point in life and time that draws them together? Why does time many times change your relationship with someone or your understanding or inability to understand them?

I keep changing so much... so I wonder about those who have been friends with me for years... do they change with me to like me? Or do they accept the change and still like me? And what about me, myself? What gets me about people? Is it about how they can help me with something later on in life? Or just being connected to them in some way makes me feel good? Or because they look good or do the same things I do, or do something completely different? Really, I don't think I'll ever really know. It will be a mystery to me always - why we really like some people, and why we don't like some, and how not liking can change into liking, and liking can change into not liking.
According to me, the mystery of why men and women are so different, or 'how to understand the mind of a woman' is less great than the mystery of what makes people click.