Thursday, December 29, 2011

Of New Year Resolutions.

Last year, after having spent a horrendous amount of time (3 years!!!) away from reading, or reading a maximum of a book a year, or even half a book a year, I decided at the start of 2011 that I would read, read, read this year. I managed to achieve that, albeit because I was caught off guard and thrown into a situation that I didn't anticipate. Still, it took conscious effort with all the traveling and work and other crazy events of the year. The books I read this year after zero reading in three years:

- To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee
- Jonathan Livingston Seagull, Richard Bach
- Lord of the Flies, William Goldberg
- White Fang, Jack London
- Shantaram, Gregory David Roberts
- Red, Irwin Allan Sealy
- Immortals of Meluha, Amish
- The secret of the Nagas, Amish
- DORK: The Incredible Adventures of Robin Einstein Verghese, Sidin Vadukut
- Cloud 9 Minus One, S.P. Kumar
- Neverwhere, Neil Gaiman
- A Passage to India, E. M. Forster
- Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman: Twenty-four Stories, Haruki Murakami

Half read:

- Vanity Fair, William Makepeace Thackeray

Currently reading:

- On the Road, Jack Kerouac

That's approximately a book a month! Yay! :) I now have a bunch of books lined up for some good alone-time and I like the feeling of being back to reading so much, that I'm going to make it a habit.

I want to keep this up along with making 2012 the year of being the "Exercise Addict" once again. I suppose new year resolutions can work. :)

Sunday, December 25, 2011

*The Dirty Picture* and the message I see

Many people I spoke to didn't like this film because of the layers of fat displayed by Vidya Balan.

"If you're on screen, you better have a perfect body!"

...was the common contention.

Apart from the fact that Vidya Balan was playing the role of a "fat South Indian (stereotype) heroine" perfectly, it surely took a lot of courage to show that much flab when the world balks and gawks at flab as though all people around are size zero. I, personally, am glad that for whatever it's worth, this movie has broken away from the stereotype in many ways. Particularly when the market that the film is catering to is the regular (and may I add, massive!) adult Bollywood audience, I'd say she has shown more guts than flab.

After all, isn't beauty in the eyes of the beholder? And, this perception changes with time too (remember voluptuous meant beautiful in the Victorian era?). I'd have been outcast as the ugliest thing alive if I'd been born then. :D I hope that with this movie begins a new generation of film that allows people to develop the sense to accept themselves the way they are and be comfortable in their own skin.

At the end of the day, it shouldn't matter if you're fat or thin, dark or fair, short or tall, as long as you are comfortable with yourself and you dress right - that is, pick colours and cuts to suit your body type.

Be comfortable!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I'm back.


How are you doing today? I just wanted to let you know, I'm back. Back, stuck, getting unstuck, planning to get stuck. And "stuck" here doesn't always hold a negative connotation.

You know?

Haha, well I don't. But I'm waiting to find out!

P.S. - It has been more books, more inspiration and a little bit of looking from above. Cool will return. :)

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Return

I returned, refreshed. Very refreshed. And with a few new perspectives tucked up the sleeve. Grown up some? Yes. But the truth is, I am a lot more inspired now than ever before. Inspired to begin again, inspired to jump the gun, take the plunge, take a risk, get a life. Sort of the oxymoron to being grown up, in a sense.

I'd like to say just you watch. Wait and watch. Because I am done waiting. It is time for action, and action it shall be! I'm getting my act together, one brisk step at a time. Moving fast. A little falling here and there is bound to be. I'm all geared, with a first aid kit. I am ready to rock and roll, baby. This means more reading, more writing, more crazy "how the hell did you manage to do that???" stuff. Comin' up shortly.

I now also do believe, two heads are better than one! :)

Thursday, July 14, 2011


Someone I was having dinner with today, and was also away from home and in California and had been away for a week asked me how long I was going to be here. When I said until September, she gasped and said - OMG, I would hate to be you! Don't you miss home? I've been here for just a week, and I already want to go back!

I had to think about that one. I'd have to say no... I don't.

What I mean is, I miss my family, my dog, the boy, my friends and everyone back in India, sure. But... I also feel so disconnected, like I could be anywhere alone. For the social creature that I am, it's saying something. I guess I'm just that comfortable anywhere, and I'd probably much rather have company I want to have, no matter where it is.

But I can wear any skin and call it mine. Some people call it confused. I call it versatile. It's not that I don't care... it's simply that I can just be.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Coffee shop girl


You see her sitting near the window, in the filtered-in sunlight. Part of her hair is lighter from the sun, and when she looks up, her brown eyes, one of them looks hazel under the sun. Her chai sits a little distance from her at the table, and she takes an occasional sip. She looks down at the books she has in her lap and on the table, one that she was reading, but put down because something caught her attention. She's pulling out another book now, and a stub of a wooden pencil, and she starts to sketch. The sketch looks like nothing that meets your eye, yet it looks like she's enjoying what she's doing, and you can tell that the end product will look good.


She sits alone at a restaurant now, in the sunlight near the window. Thinking. Picking the sushi from the plate in front of her with chopsticks and chewing it slowly as she keeps staring out of the window and at nothing. A part of her is inspired to be the same person, with the same freedom to express at will through any medium. Now all she has is her thoughts, and a hope that she will get back to being able to do all the things she used to do.


She finished the sketch. Maybe it was inspired by something she'd seen when she'd looked up. It was a sketch symbolic of how empty she might be if she hadn't had her freedom of expression.

Friday, June 3, 2011


Yesterday roomie K and I were bonding over the music that defined us in college: "Back in Bangalore when we were yeng and happy" :P

They were the songs that played at every club and restaurant then, and more importantly - at every college fest! Some of the non-rock stuff we heard often or listened to (because you know, we were like, the cool chicks who listened to rock) and loved included -

Jamelia, Superstar:

Beyonce, Crazy in Love:

Kylie Minogue, Can't get you outa my head, Come into my world:



Nelly ft. Kelly Rowland, Dilemma:

Ja Rule ft. Ashanti, Always on time:

Jennifer Lopez, Waiting for tonight, Ain't it funny, Jenny from the block (yummy Ben Affleck!):




Jamirpquoi, Love Foolosophy:

Safri Duo, Played A Live:

David Guetta, Love don't let me go:

Justin Timberlake, Girlfriend:

Avril Lavigne (remember what she used to be like?), Complicated, I'm with you:



Fatboy Slim, Lazy (can't find original! :( You can hear the song I'm talking about for 5 seconds at the start), Weapon of choice, Push the tempo:




Chemical Brothers, Do it again:

Enrique Iglesias, Escape, Love to see you cry:



Craig David, Whats your flava:

Sigh........ :) Nostalgic?

I also think that there is very, very little singing talent in today's music. And too little variety.

The "Rocker chick" in me says "What happened to all the rock? Where is it?" There were so many good bands with GOOD music then - Creed, Alter Bridge, Pearl Jam, Nickelback, Alice in Chains, Matchbox Twenty, Puddle of Mudd and tons more ...don't you think?

Let me know if you can think of any more and find any more of the late 1900's - early 2000's era songs :)

Mannnnn :) Loved the music then!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

You know you need more sleep when...

~ Takes a wad of cotton
~ Puts a little moisturiser on it
~ Rubs off the kaajal
~ Rubs, rubs, it doesn't come off

Oh wait. That's dark circles! :|

Oh yeah?




Sometimes I have these nightmares, but I'm wide awake. I see a future that's not yet here but still so real and so close. I'm numbed into silence and wonder, I'm growing yonder, towards this vision.

I hope that it doesn't come true, I'm already half ashamed. That in my heart I hold in me the half-sadistic desire. I can hear glass shattering.

And I wake up, and I'm right in the middle of the nightmare.

Little Star

Dedicated to my little star. Congrats and lots of love!

Little star shining bright
You give us hopes and dreams
Little star, so proud you make
Us all and you inspire!

In the time when things were grey
And mist and dust and fire
You sat and worked and worked your way
To shooting high and far

Twinkle in the eye from tears
And hope and confidence alive
Now we learn, we learn from you
The key is persistence and strife

Little star you shine so bright
I'm oh-so-proud tonight
Tomorrow you will light the sky
And be that twinkle in my eye.

Dealings in money

Person: Are you planning to buy a car?
Me: No, a hovercraft.
Person: ?
Me: By the time I can afford a car.... there will only be hovercrafts :|

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Happy Ending

A stranger can be so much more comforting
Than someone you consider close
Can be so genuine, no ulterior motives
Nor reasons to exhibit symptoms of dissociative disorder.

Just sitting and watching television, sleeping all day
Can be a good break
A therapy session can be one long, hot shower
And some aromatic body wash to go with it.

Living in the present can be such a lull
As compared to living in the past or future
Magnifying the good times or creating
A whole new possibility.

Being responsible means giving up the things you enjoy
And doing things that you don't like, everyday
And waiting, waiting for and waiting to find that one thing
That is responsible, enjoyable and definitive of you.

You don't know whether the happy ending
Is the start
Or the end
Or the middle.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The thing about intoxication... that it's a good feeling.

It's sobriety that doesn't wear off.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Let your light shine :)

If truth be told, I'll tell you this
This truth mayn't provide you bliss
Or may, perhaps if you dwell on it
It may even keep your flame still lit.

In life we slowly build a cage
That grows smaller, the more you age
Ever seen a stooping, cane-bearing man?
Make you shrink, the cage can.

We build and build, almost no window
And the door - Oh! It's so low
We stop the search, the search for life
Instead, to follow a set path, our strife

There's an opening though, in every cage
No matter what be your age
Peeping out you'll see a flame, bright
The essence of you, that is your light

And of this flame you are in control
You can just watch it and not unroll
The power of you; flame behold
Control it and the power you'll unfold.

You're that burning light, at heart
You can burn your cage apart
Take control, and allow yourself to discover
The you that has been long undercover

However old you may be, this is just the start
I've not even begun to tell you the best part
The universal truth is that you will do
What you truly, deeply want to

But only if you keep on searching, will the flame
Be alive, and you've only yourself to blame
For stopping too soon and allowing it
To die a premature death.

Life's not over at your age - there is
So much more to do and see. And this
Flame is your passion, keep it burning
For once it's out, there's no returning.
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